Monday, September 2, 2013

Would Anyone Hire This Kitteh?

Get a job? Oh no, I am not amused!!
Hey there! It’s Annabelle again. The Warden said Labor Day was a purrrrfect time for me to quit my copious catnapping and go find a job. “What? We cats don’t work! It’s against the Cat Rulebook,” I meowed emphatically. She wasn’t impressed that I quoted that book; she said it was written by some anonymous cat which made it invalid. Pshaw!

So then she tried to appeal to my emotional side, asking me if I felt bad eating all that kibble when I didn’t contribute to the household. Um…nope! Cats eat, play, sleep and then, eat some more. That’s it!

She had the nerve to remind me that she was still crazy-short on the green papers… all because of me. You may remember that a few months ago I was really sick. I spent four days at the vets after horking all night long, then refusing every foodables under the sun and looking rather comatose. At the time, the Warden didn’t care how many green papers it took as long as I could get well and come home. So I did…and now she’s paying for it, or trying to anyway.

Yeah… I guess I do feel kind of bad about that. If I could get a job, she’d be less stressed about the bills and I’d get lots more cuddles! (I already get lots, but a kitteh can never have too many cuddles!).

I put my paws together and came up with a few jobs I could apply for.

*Chief Paper Shredder – I just love eating paper – especially the Warden’s impawtant work papers! – so I would definitely excel at this job. Paper has lots of fiber and tastes yummy, too, so this job would have benefits I could sink my teeth into.

*Seat Filler – You know how the Academy Awards hires people to sit in the celebs’ seats when they go to the loo, so the place always looks packed? I’d be a natural at this job. Every time the Warden gets up from her chair to go do something, there is a cat in it – ME!! – when she gets back.

* Office Supply Clerk – I like to keep track of all the pens, pencils, paper clips, erasers, DVDs and sticky note pads by pushing them all off the Warden’s desk…so naturally I’d be a pro at this job from the get-go.

* Treat Taste Tester – Companies that make foodables always need taste testers to make sure their product is up to snuff. I’d be pawsome at this job because I just LOVE all kinds of treats. Even if it didn’t pay much, the tasty treats would make up for it.

* Psychotherapist – I already have experience doing this job!! Heaven knows I have to (pretend to) listen while the Warden tells me all her troubles. I could do the same with anyone else, and if I came home and told the Warden, she might feel better because surely there are people out there with worse problems than hers! MOL.

***

Because every job seeker must carefully analyze their weaknesses as well as their strengths, here are a few careers I’d fail famously:

See? I ALWAYS turn my head!
* Photography Model – When the Warden aims her camera at me, I turn my head. I can’t help it! She says it's a miracle when she manages to snap a shot with me looking at the camera.

* Restaurant Critic – I’d be no good at this job because I love ALL food, so I’d never be able to criticize a darn thing.

* Walmart Greeter – You’ve got to love strangers and be friendly to be good at this job. I possess neither quality. I only love the Warden and a few choice people, that’s it. Strangers? Fuhgetaboutit!

What job(s) would you be good at?

18 comments:

  1. Annabelle Mom says you looking gorgeous is enough for you to earn your keep! She also understands the concept of not worrying about Vet bills until the dust clears. We are going through that right now ourselves. We just wish we could have had the same outcome as you and your Mom did. But, we didn't care about the green papers then and only wish we still had Abby with us.

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  2. Annabelle, you're beautiful enough to get a job as a supermodelcat.

    The head peep sometimes says that Newton could get a job as a Wal Mart greeter because he likes to see who is at the door. But he hides every time it thunders, and we aren't sure that Wal Mart would appreciate that.

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  3. Well, us dogs are much better suited for jobs than fleabags... oops, my bad... I meant kitties. In fact, one of my jobs is herding my short hairy meowing siblings. And I'd love being a Wal-mart greeter. Then I could show off for a lot more people than just the "Boss."

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  4. Good jobs, every single one of them! We personally think we'd excel in Box Sitting....because you never know where and when boxes will go if let to their own devices. Purrs...

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  5. I'm great at the job I already have - CEO and boss of my human! No need to change careers.

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  6. All those jobs, especially the paper shredding will get old real quickly. I earn more money than TW cos my blog earns money although not nearly as much as someone at Blogpaws promised me. I'm gonna have a talk with them cos I only want what's owed to me. And, yes, as Sparkle says, we all have an important job bossing around our staff so our blogs will come out in a timely manner and correctly.

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  7. I do follow you. But I will see you tomorrow cause mommy hasta get to beds.

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  8. Well Annabelle I think you'd be purrrfect for any of those jobs.....anything involving food, relaxing, or looking adorable I'm intested in. I'm imminently qualified in fact. True these days I've cut back a lot in the "destructo" department - at my age I think just looking handsome is enough of a job without having to claw/shred my way to success. I'm glad you're over the hork-a-rama though....that's NOT fun.

    Kitty Hugs, Sammy

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  9. Cute post! Reminds me of the book "Careers for Your Cat" :)
    I think I would be best at being a "food taster".......yep that's for me!
    Love, Cody

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  10. Well Annabelle, I needs to find a job too. The taste tester sounds good cept I am only allowed to eat y/d food. ~Socks

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  11. Annabelle you seem to have it all sussed!! I think I am an organiser, as I organise the staff and Tigger very well!

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  12. Mommy laughed a lot as she imagined what it would look like if the Academy Awards hired only cats as seat fillers. The celebrities would get up to present or accept an award or to perform on stage, and a seat filler kitty would take his place but then refuse to get up once the celebrity returned. By the end of the show, every seat in the theater would be filled with a cat surrounded by celebrities standing around trying to find somewhere to sit.

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  13. I think you would be good at anything sweetie! Me? My job is sister chaser!

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  14. Well, we would like to work in a mattress factory. We could test out the finished mattresses for comfiness and sleep-worthiness. :)

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  15. Yeah, these ungrateful Humans--when we're sick they're all oh, my sweet-little-darling I will go to the ends of the earth for you!!! And then when we're better they're all, What have you done for me lately? Sheesh.

    The only one of those jobs you should even CONSIDER is the restaurant critic cause at least you'd get something, you know, USEFUL. What good are green papers to us???

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  16. Annabelle, theese are really all awesome ideas you got there, girl! Especially theese "seat filler" one! Psychotherapist is good too, you can always "pretend" that you'z listening...great post!

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  17. Annabelle... you have far more responsibility than we ever realized and think the human should stop complaining and give your a raise instead! Purrs from the Zee and Zoey gang

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